stevepratt.com

The Toothless Wonder

Cedar can no longer eat carrots.  She lost the second of her top front teeth on Friday night and the first one hasn't grown in yet.  LOVE the look of a giant gap in a kid's mouth!

Better Late Than Never...

Last weekend, our cherry blossom trees finally burst forth with their bright pink flowers. I'm assuming it's due to unseasonably cold weather (apparently, this April was the coldest on record for Vancouver), but the blooming was well over a month behind schedule.  And then, whammo - this weekend, they all began coming down.  It sounds odd, but I look forward to the flowers all year and it's only this year that I've realized that they barely last 7 days.

Singing Songs Of Colour

Cedar's school had their spring concert this week.  It was a 2 hour extravaganza featuring a student-written opera, a student written play, dancing and singing.  Being in Kindergarten, Cedar had about 3 minutes of stage time, but it was pretty great.  The class sang a few songs about colours, waving streamers and dressed up as crazy hippies in tie-dye shirts and headbands. 

Cedar's Got Crabs

Dog Hole

At the beach this weekend, Dawson got some help from Sandy digging a giant hole in the sand. I'm quite sure Sandy thought that Dawson was helping dig her a new den in which to bury sticks and tennis balls.

Open House at the Cement Factory

Is that the least appealing headline ever?  Open House at the Cement Factory.  And yet, strange as it sounds, it was a huge hit with the kids.  Down at Granville Island, Ocean Cement opened up their lot and let kids climb into all the cement mixers, get free balloons, and play in a giant sand pile.  Wheeeee!

My Wife Is Cheating On Me...

It's true.  I discovered the sad, ugly truth this weekend.  The Maggot has been playing games behind my back... with several of my closest friends.  And all of it has been cloaked under a veil of secrecy, designed to keep me in the dark.

This is the man at the epicenter of it all: Clax Vandle (not his real name - more on that in a minute...)

I USED to consider him one of my best friends.  You see, I was under the impression that Clax hated and despised Facebook and had decided to never join.  However, due to several factors (including alcohol), it came to my attention this weekend that he is indeed on Facebook using the pseudonym of 'Clax Vandle' in place of his real name (which will now remain anonymous).

THEN I found out that he has been 'friends' with my wife on Facebook for almost a month... as 'Clax.'

And THEN I found out that the two of them have been playing Scrabulous games online since he joined!!!  (AND my wife only invited me to play Scrabulous last week!!!)  THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!

And THEN I discovered that my wife has been playing Scrabulous with several of my other friends, none of whom have ever invited ME to play Scrabulous.  THIS IS A DOUBLE OUTRAGE!

You think you know someone and then they stab you in the heart with a virtual scrabble tile.  My wife is a Facebook floozie.  A two-timing social networking tart.

And I am a cuckold.  A Scrabulous-ed, Facebooked, friendless cuckold.

Idiot Dad

After looking at Dawson today while playing toy cars with him, I quite randomly decided to give him a haircut.  Lisa's given him his only two previous haircuts, as he's been freaked out by barbers, hair salons, etc, every time he's gone near one.  However, Lisa was not home, I was bored, and I just did it.
Bad call.  I had no idea what I was doing and now he looks like Jim Carrey from Dumb & Dumber.
Before:

After:

Jim Carrey:

Ridiculous Weather

April 18, 2008 - Vancouver.  Hail followed by several inches of snow.  (see the blossoms on the tree in the background?) WTF?

The Tooth Fairy Cometh...

After about a month of wiggling, jiggling, pulling and yanking, one of Cedar's top front teeth fell out this week. The other one is not far behind, so soon she'll probably have enormous difficulty eating apples and carrots.  Good thing she's not a horse.

Comedy Death Ray In Vancouver - Awesome Show, Great Job!

There is nothing like seeing artists at the top of their game.  I think I've been spoiled by working at an indie music network, where I almost take amazing performances and compositions for granted because I'm around it so much.  But this weekend, I was in genuine awe after a couple of stellar comedy showcases in Vancouver.

Promoter Will Davis, who seems to bring just about every cutting edge comic out there to Vancouver, put on a weekend featuring Patton Oswalt (probably the best working standup out there), Janeane Garofalo, Greg Berhendt, and... TIM AND ERIC!

Being a HUGE fan of both Patton and Tim and Eric, this was about the best comedy lineup I could dream of and they didn't disappoint.  Fellow comedy freak, Jordan Kawchuk, came to both shows, too, and we were blown away.  Patton did a full set at the Vogue theatre on Friday night, and headlined the Comedy Death Ray show on Saturday at the Commodore (Comedy Death Ray is basically just a standup showcase with phenomenal 'alternative' comedians on the bill).  Both nights, he just killed. 

Patton put out a new comedy album last fall, Werewolves and Lollipops, and having bought it and listened to it several times, I was fully prepared to hear all the bits that I already knew, sensing that my enjoyment of the show would not be the surprise of new material, but in seeing the live performance.  In his hour long set, he did ONE JOKE from the album.  Everything else was totally new, including great material about his experience at the Oscars last weekend. In total control, the audience hanging on his every word, he was simply amazing. 

Second to last on the Comedy Death Ray bill was my personal obsession, Tim and Eric, doing their first live show in Vancouver.  I LOVE how original they are.  The entire 20-minute bit was trying to persuade everyone how great Papa John's pizza was.  It was in a similar vein to their brilliant fake marketing campaign for Shrek 3 this past summer - the conceit is that they do a lot of free work for companies that they love.  It began with hurling slices of pizza into the crowd, singing a Papa John's song, and evolved into a brilliant bit about how the biggest perk of switching to Papa John's was the availability of a Papa John's email address (steve@papajohns.com) that, for an extra premium, included pizza-themed 3D emoticons.  There were lots of people, like Jordan and I, who were killing ourselves laughing, and there were chunks of people, like my wife and friend Clay, who didn't get it and honestly couldn't understand why we thought it was funny.  After the show, they seemed genuinely interested in trying discover why we thought it was hilarious because they couldn't comprehend it. And when you try to explain why something is funny, it never, ever works.  So Tim and Eric continue to polarize with their utterly unique comedy style - I love it!

The best part of the weekend for a giant comedy nerd like me was getting to actually meet most of them.  Jordan and I had a really interesting talk with Tim & Eric, who are both great guys (although we probably came across as creepy, obsessive stalkers).  And we also got to talk fairly briefly with Patton and Janeane (who knows more about Canadian politics than most Canadians - she even knew Bill C-10, the attempt to allow the government to withdraw funding from 'offensive productions'.)

All in all, a helluva weekend that leaves me completely inspired and in awe of the unique and brilliant minds working in comedy today.

The Future Of The Internet!

Just back from Winnipeg, where CBC Radio's Arts & Entertainment staff were holding two days of talking about the web, where the future of radio is, and how 'radio' shows are rapidly becoming just 'shows' that are on the radio, on podcasts, with blogs, and occasionally with video.
The most entertaining part was the time spent with the group actually trying stuff out and playing around.  The group was split in two and each team was challenged to use 3-5 web tools to make content about the fact that CBC types were in Winnipeg trying to figure out the future.

Here are two videos that the teams came up with:

In my opinion, pretty awesome stuff for a few hours work!

Most Shocking Video On The Internet!

For those who haven't heard about it, "2 Girls, 1 Cup" is the latest internet video sensation.  There are loads of videos with millions of views on YouTube featuring people watching a horrifically graphic video involving 2 women, 1 cup, and bodily fluids.  The funny thing, most people have probably never seen the ACTUAL video - the phenomenon and entertainment factor is in witnessing the reactions of others watching it.  People screaming, dry-heaving, running away - they are genuine reactions of disgust, shock, and amazement.  Here's a compilation sampler:

WELL, Jordan at CBC Radio 3 has created a tribute called "2 Girls, 1 Bed" based on a new 'controversial' video from beloved Canadian singer-songwriter, Hayden.  There are reactions and the ACTUAL video!!! Check it out...

Cedar's Family Portrait Gallery

Cedar draws constantly.  We go through a ream of paper a week.  Usually, she draws about 1,000 of the same thing - a princess over and over and over again. 
This week, she started trying to draw a bunch of family members.  Here are her final portraits, plus a recent photo of her subject (although she draws without any reference photos).  I LOVE the phonetic spelling of all our names: Lisa becomes 'lesu' (lee-suh), Steve becomes 'sdev', Dawson becomes 'dosin', Kooky becomes 'coce' (coo-kee).  Why I am the only one with ears, I don't know. And, as for her self-portrait, she nails the spelling of her own name, but the nose is somewhat... er, disturbing.  
   

Spagett!

My children are obsessed with Tim & Eric's sketch, 'Spagett!'  Okay, okay, so maybe I 'helped' get them obsessed by playing it about 50 times.  However, while mindlessly bored in the rain this weekend, we made our own video tribute to the original.   Here's Cedar and Dawson's Spagett!...

And here's the Tim & Eric version:

Family Xmas Video

I took a few brief minutes of video around the tree this year and put together the highlights in iMovie.  Kudos to Sydney for providing a theme...

Polar Bear Swim 2008!

For the second year in a row, I took the plunge into the icy waters of English Bay with my friend Aron Bjornson.  This year, he brought along his sister, Katrina, and a few of her friends, so it was more of a team effort this year, which made it easier to do the deed.

We tried unsuccessfully to find parking downtown, so relocated to Kits Beach and dipped there.  It was much nicer than last year, when it was pouring rain and very cold.  This year, clear and crisp, although the pain of hitting the water was remarkably similar.  The worst part was frozen feet on frozen sand after getting out. 

I was first in, first out this year, clearly showing my intense desire to get it over with. 

Here's the evidence (I'm the one in the bright orange trunks...)

Holiday Roundup

It's been so busy the last two weeks that I'm very late in putting this up.  My brother, Brian, his wife, Kerri-Lynn, and their one-year old daughter, Sydney, came out here for Christmas week with my parents, so the whole Pratt clan was together for the holidays.

As evidenced in the top picture, Cedar wrote her note to Santa by herself for the first time.

The tree was ridiculous this year, with presents for 9 people, including 3 young children.  There were lots of gift highlights:

Cedar:
-A Snow White doll
-A Baby Alive that pees itself
-A giant play kitchen where she now regularly whips up imaginary pancakes, muffins, and ice cream

Dawson
-A wagon
-A ton of wooden train tracks
-Trains, planes and automobiles

Lisa:
-A book on cooking omelettes from Courtney (a taunt, as there is an ongoing competition for reigning omelette champion of the Pratt family)
-Sweaters, shirts, and a cape / shawl from a local designer that transforms Lisa into Super Maggot
-iPod nano

Me:
-Blue Rodeo tickets at the Orpheum
-Steve Martin's book about his standup comedy career
-Guitar Hero III for the Wii, which I've been playing constantly for the last week

Other good moments:
-My mother opening up the gag-gift of a stringy thong
-Courtney getting a brain-training game and quickly determining that his mental age is 80.
-Some gorgeous weather with spectacular views of the city.

Maui Trip

We're in Maui for a week and so far, 2 days in, it's spectacular.  Not going to spend a lot of time on here, but wanted to post some pics.  They're are a lot on Flickr, so check them out here.
  Good news  - for those who know me, there are LOTS of pictures of waves hitting rocks like this...

Hockey Fairy Halloween

Fairy madness continued past the birthday and into Halloween.  Cedar added on to the original costume with a giant blonde wig and looked Fairylicious. 

This was Dawson's first real year dressing up and understanding what it was all about.  He wanted to be a hockey player, so we stuffed paper into the shoulders of his sweatshirt, put a helmet on him, and gave him a black eye and the piece de resistance - a handlebar mustache. 

The night was lots of fun.  Maggot and I both took turns taking them out trick or treating.  Dawson was hilarious - he just squeezed through all the other kids waiting at each door until he got to the front, and when the door opened, he just raised up his candy bag until he got the goods, and then tore back to the sidewalk, never once uttering a sound. 

The night ended on a bit of a sour note, though.  We passed by a house in our neighbourhood called the "House of Death."  It featured a giant, one-storey painting of a bloody skull and was designed as a spookfest.  Cedar saw the skull and completely lost it.  She backed into a tree, where a guy from the house was hiding, dressed up in tree parts (like a mask made of bark with creepy eye holes cut out).  She screamed again.  And then someone let off a firecracker in the street and a HUGE band exploded and both the kids basically crapped their drawers.  End of Halloween.